I woke up, let's go with, about 30 times throughout last night. It was really a series of progressive naps in which I had dreams about reality and what a fuck up I am..or sex, because I woke up with this terrible feeling in my stomach which happens when I do that. I also managed to hit my face around 7 times. Overall, an unsuccessful evening of slumber. I hope tomorrow will be better.
I did talk to Rachael yesterday, which was nice. I hope that she can forgive me on some level someday. I don't know how to fix this, I don't know if I even can (not completely anyways). This is just another instance of my big mouth getting in the way. Until then..whatever then is, I will only continue to try and be good to her and take my drugs like I'm supposed to.
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