tell me that you're happy now

Four more weeks until I am done. I don't have to deal with NMU any more after this. Rewind. I love Northern Michigan University. I've met a lot of really amazing people and had some really great times. It was a good experience. But once the excitement of it all wears off, I realized that I don't know what I'm doing here. With Hannah and I no longer being friends...it's honestly like a thick fog lifting off of my brain. I can think clearly. Good times aside, I was here for the wrong reasons. My new plan is as follows: 1. Go home, enjoy the summer, reconnect with people I've neglected: In all my stupidity, I neglected to enjoy the little things. It was stupid and it won't happen again. 2. Attend OCC: Dropping out of school would be stupid. I'll take classes that I will enjoy and save up some money to get the hell out of Michigan. 3. Work: Make the big bucks so I won't have to beg for food in CA. 4. Get out: That's the best part. California awaits. Not as detailed as it could be, but you get the gist of it. Mom's not happy. Didn't expect her to be. But with everything that I've gotten off my chest lately, I'm really grateful that my family has been supportive. I'm not even 100% sure that that's what I'm going to do. It's the greatest feeling in the world when you have no secrets from anyone and all the bad shit doesn't matter anymore. Everything is going right for the first time in a long time. Since I won't be at NMU, I need to buy a laptop. And I can't decide between a Mac and just a nice gaming computer. Can't really afford either. A digital SLR camera, probably a Nikon or Canon, will be in my near future too. I'm pretty excited. Anyways, this "falling out" that I've had with Hannah...shit. Just let me tell you, best thing that's happened to me in a long time. I am truly happy. No regrets though. Don't ever regret something that once made you happy, right? And I honestly hope she's happy. I hope she goes places in life. Mostly, I just hope that one day we can look back and remember the fun we had the past year or so. Honestly, I miss the idea of her more than I actually miss her though. "The people you love will either leave you or die." Fight Club, Chuck Palahniuk Pessimistic. The glass is half empty. Yeah. But true, no less. I just see it as honesty. I'll be a better person for it in the end. This summer I'm going to read. A lot. I ordered a ton of shit off Amazon. And, I'm learning about numerology. It's going to be fun. Moral of the story: I'm really looking forward to the next few weeks. Four more and I plan on making them damn good. Then I'm out. And I can't wait. It's a fresh start. EDIT: This was my horoscope today. "Every good thing must come to an end, and you'll be saying goodbye to a pleasant person or experience today. But don't be too sad for too long -- saying goodbye to one thing just gives you the opportunity to say hello to something new! It is a great day to put into action one of those ideas you've kept simmering on the back burner for so long. You can make something happen and embark on a whole new journey. Take advantage of the possibilities that are all around you."